A journey of discovery through the challenges of adaptation and the creation of a new identity, told with the heart of someone who has lived it.

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An inner and geographical journey

The experience of leaving one’s country of origin to establish oneself in a new reality is a journey that goes well beyond simple geographical displacement. I have personally lived this transformation and as a counselor specialized in supporting expatriates, I share some reflections on this stimulating and enriching journey.

A growing community

According to 2023 Eurostat data, more than 17 million European citizens live in another EU country, representing about 4% of the total population. In addition, there are about 24 million residents born outside the EU. In total, nearly 10% of the European population experiences expatriation. In France alone, expatriates represent about 7% of the population with steadily increasing numbers. You are not alone in this journey.

The dance between your roots and the new terrain

One of the most intense challenges in your journey abroad is finding a personal balance between your original identity and the new culture that welcomes you. It’s not about abandoning who you are to become someone else but creating an inner space where both dimensions can nourish each other. Like a tree that extends new roots into fertile ground and never loses its original ones.

The transactional analysis approach

Transactional analysis offers valuable tools for understanding and managing the expatriation experience: 

• The concept of “ego states” helps identify the parts of us that react to cultural challenges: when our Normative Parent judges differences or when the Child feels overwhelmed 
• The concept of “positive recognition” (psychological “strokes”) reminds us of the importance of building new sources of confirmation and validation in the new environment 
• The analysis of “communicative exchanges” (the “transactions”) offers us a key to interpret social interactions in the new culture by helping us understand why sometimes we feel misunderstood or confused 
• Work on the “life script” helps recognize how decisions made in childhood influence our way of facing change

Weaving your new network of connections

Human beings are social creatures and the quality of our relationships profoundly influences our well-being. Recreating a network of meaningful connections takes time, the courage to show authenticity and an openness to meeting others. Each new connection is a seed that enriches the ground of your new belonging.

Strategies for thriving in the new context

• Practice emotional awareness: Recognize and accept emotions such as nostalgia, frustration, or fear, without judging yourself 
• Listen to your rhythm: Respect your adaptation time, without pressures or comparisons with those who seem to integrate more quickly 
• Create connection rituals: Regularly dedicate time to maintain contacts with family and friends from your country of origin but also to explore the new culture 
• Balance familiarity and novelty: Alternate moments of comfort (familiar foods, films in your language) with cultural immersion experiences 
• Find your “cultural bridges”: Look for people who know both worlds and can help you decipher the implicit codes of the new culture

The privilege of the dual perspective

Over time, one of the most precious gifts emerges from the experience of those who live between different cultures: the ability to see the world through multiple prisms. This dual perspective enriches our understanding of reality and transforms us into natural mediators between different worlds. 

Remember that this journey is not linear. There will be days of nostalgia and moments of exciting discoveries. The ability to adapt while maintaining one’s own essence is perhaps the most precious skill we develop as citizens of the world.